Tuesday, April 5, 2011

Craziness at Golden Corral

Hahahaha, we ate out this past weekend and it was quite an experience. We went to Golden Corral b/c it is super easy to find something for Nicholas to eat on a buffet and there is no waiting for food to be delivered which also makes dining with Nicholas an easier experience. First thing, as most buffets of this sort go you have to wait in line and then pay before you can enter over eaters paradise, (aka the buffet). While waiting in line I noticed a sign that read " for your convenience plates and utensils are located on the buffet islands. These items are strictly optional".  Ummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm ???? Optional ??? So I can just go up to the buffet and grab the whole (probably scalding hot) platter of fried chicken and maybe some containers of veggies and bring them back to my table? Or I can just pull my chair up and eat directly off the buffet (with my hands??) ?? Since when is a plate optional at a restaurant? I can see maybe some paranoid type people bringing their own silverware but plates??? That is just weird, but then we were in Pensacola and there are some ummm interesting folks living there. Thankfully all the patrons I observed were taking advantage of the optional plates and silverware.

Next thing I noticed, and maybe this is a regional thing, but since when is it acceptable to head out to the golden corral in full blown hooker I'm ready to get laid and paid attire.... in your 40;s ?? YIKES!! My husband spent a fair amount of time staring down at his plate to avoid having his eyes seared out of his head but a particular patron who didn't get the memo that just because you can stuff your cellulite in those leggings doesn't mean you can go out in public wearing them. Newsflash, men don't want to see a morbidly obese woman's butt crack or lumpy butt and NOBODY want to see the pantie line of your g-string or it poking out above the tops of your waaayyyy to small pants. The people who sat down right behind us were extra special too. Again, when you turn 35 and you look 45 it's time to start dressing like an adult. Sorry, I don't make the rules. :P These people had two children with them grade school age, and they were really raising them up right. Little girl, about 8ish was a little hooker in training in her outfit. Since when are F me boots made in kid sizes??? She also had her hair dyes (with roots grown out about an inch and a half in true redneck fashion) this god awful maroon red color that some many people seem to find attractive. It matched her mothers lol. It was awful. Come on people, don't do that to your kids. Let them have a natural hair color, kids that young don't need makup and sexy clothes. And we wonder why teen pregnancy is such a big issue... HELLLLLLOOOO??  The little boy had the honest to goodness strangest haircut I have ever seen in my life. I have to wonder who's idea it was. He had a patch of hair about the size of a half dollar right in the middle of his forehead where the hair was grown out and allowed to hang down right between his eyes. The rest of his head was shaved bald. It was sort of like a reverse rat tail. I don't even know what to say about that?? I just hope that it was the little boys idea and he liked it.

The extra special people behavior wasn't limited to just the eating area of the restaurant. I had to go to the bathroom near the end of the meal and left Nicholas in daddy's care to go take care of business. Wow.... Just wow.... I found myself in a stall between two teens who were texting each other while they were doing whatever it was that needed doing and giggling like they escape from the mental ward of the local hospital. Umm why not just sit next to each other and talk ?? Weird. Then comes in a lady who heads into one of the stalls and is interrupted by her cell phone ringing. Now my view on this is let it ring. Take care of yourself and then call whoever back. It'll only take a minute. Don't answer your phone, this is just NOT classy. Well, nobody ever told this lady that and not only did she answer but she answered and put her phone on speaker. WOW! Guess who was calling?? Her husband, and he was calling from the table to tell her to hurry it up b/c he wanted to go and get ice cream and he couldn't b/c he was stuck sitting with their kids. WOW!!! Really? She proceeds to have a fight with him in the bathroom on the speaker phone about how she'll take as long as she damn well pleases and there is nothing he can do about it. I couldn't help it. I was finished but I sat there an extra minute or so just for pure entertainment value. LoL. On the way out of the bathroom the sign on the door read " if this restroom has not met your expectation please notify a member of management". ROFL, oh I think we've more than met my expectations!

Oh the way out to the car I almost felt the need to pay an extra dollar or two for the show. I mean I didn't realize entertainment would come with the meal. For once Nicholas wasn't the funniest thing in the place, though he was the cutest :P I will definitely be back here!! The food was actually pretty good and the wait staff was great as well. Easy place to take baby, good food, good waiter, and a dinner show. What more can you ask for ?

I'm soooo probably going to hell.....

1 comment: