Wednesday, December 5, 2012

It's been a while but I'm back :)

         It's been a long, long while since I've written here, more than a year in fact, but life has continued on and I have continued to stumble through it and this whole parenting situation I find myself in. :)  Nicholas has continued to grow and learn and celebrated his second birthday in a fine fashion. Gosh in just a few months he will celebrate his third! Wow... sometimes I don't know where the time has gone. Seems like when you have a baby somebody hits fast forward on your life and time just flies. :)

     So what's been up you may be wondering. Well there have been some major ups, to many to list here, and a few downs over the past year or so. Nicholas has finally begun to speak, and now we can't get him to zip it lol. He's also a little tape recorder and mimics all the things we wish he wouldn't say. My husband almost missed a turn in the car a couple weeks ago and said "oh crap". From the backseat we hear a very joyful voice say "Oh crap! Oh crap!". Oops, parenting fail lol. Whatever I'm just glad he's talking. I was really beginning to worry when we got to his second birthday and he was still mostly non verbal except the constant babbling. Over the summer he went through a phase where he had a new word or phrase every day. It was a super neat thing to be witness to. :)

     When last I wrote we were in the process of trying to conceive another baby and mother nature had pulled one of her worst pranks and taken away a pregnancy. I didn't think lightening could strike twice so to speak and figured that surely it wouldn't happen again. I was in for a hard lesson as it turned out. Lighten struck more than twice I'm afraid and a bit of TTC depression (and lets be honest here insanity) saw me abandon this blog and just about everything else (apart from Nicholas of course). It's a bit hard to write anything when all your thoughts center on one subject and few of those thoughts are positive. I'm over it now though and happy once again and much wiser. That which doesn't kill you teaches you. I figure I had some lesson I was supposed to be learning, patience or graciousness perhaps, and that God and/or the universe would grant me another baby when and if I was deemed ready. I wont lie, the waiting was hard. Perhaps I'm a slow learner? It eventually entered my mind though that I hadn't seen anything like what some people have to go through nor had I waited as long as some people have to wait and I maybe should be grateful for what I had (Nicholas) and how easy it was to get the first time and be content with that. See, maybe I was learning :P My family welcomed another baby (not mine) into the family and I couldn't have been more excited. Granted when I learned my sister was in labor I'll admit to having a few bad moments alone in the bathroom sobbing my jealous little heart out but other than that I was excited and I had a blast the next morning when I was able to go shopping for a new baby girl. It's difficult to say the least to watch a friend or family member go through a pregnancy and give birth to a baby due just days before or after one have lost. Maybe that's me being ungrateful again though. Our first angel was due 10 days after my niece was born. That was a touch rough but once I laid eyes on the beautiful blue eyed addition to the extended family all that was on the back burner and remained there. Besides it was AMAZINGLY FUN to go shopping and be able to buy PINK! Whoo!! I was soooo excited and much more content than I had been in a long long while. Amazing what a baby can do to put joy into your heart isn't it? Even if said baby isn't yours lol.  I left the hospital with a magical door hanger from Disney World which may or may not have helped make a baby in spite of saying (and believing) that I was broken. I told my step mother that it was already to late this month anyhow. Her response to me "No, maybe not. God can do WHATEVER He wants". Easy to say if you believe in God and I the time I wasn't sure I did. Those were wise words though as it turned out and they resurfaced in my mind about three weeks later. ;)

     For the past 10 months or so I've been consumed with thoughts on pregnancy, birth, and newborn parenting, baby wearing, breastfeeding, and cloth diapering. I've also developed an addiction to shopping on pages like diaper swappers for various baby items and took up crocheting. Of course as usual I have numerous opinions and you know you want to know what they are lol!!! No worries, I'll share. I've got great news and it's been a very very exciting time and the excitements just keep coming. :) All in all life plus baby has been pretty good in 2012 and getting better. I'm super excited for Christmas and the coming year. 2013 is going to be awesome I am certain! As a matter of fact I simply won't hear of it being less than amazing. :) 



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